I’ve just watched the video, above, of Glennon Melton’s TEDx talk. It resonated so powerfully with me. The past 10 years of my life have been spent removing, what she calls, my capes. Capes are what we use to try to stop ourselves from having to deal with the hard, messy feelings that we have, in reaction to the world that is out there. Capes are how we create a “safe”, clean, controlled world to stay in, instead. It’s just sheer dumb luck, I think, that my capes were things like good grades instead of bulimia, or musical skill instead of alcoholism. Lucky, only because my cape-things were less outwardly-destructive. But inwardly — just as much so, I think. Removing them was just as brutal as she describes, and just as beautiful too. It’s interesting that having a child is what finally prompted us both to start showing up and being real. It’s still hard sometimes, but not as often as it used to be. And it’s also a lot easier in other ways. Like that Mark Twain quote says, “If you tell the truth, then you don’t have to remember anything”.
June 6, 2013